That Better Not Be Martha Stewart at My Door!

I have a dilemma. In a previous post (here) I told you about our the demise of our dining room carpet. So, ever since, I've been slightly embarrassed by it's absence. Not with my close friends. They accept me, my family (and our home, I guess) with all our flaws and love us anyways. That's what friends are for, right?

I'm talking about the OTHERS. Who are the others? Well, that might just be you, the one reading this blog right now. You know - the type of relationship you have with people where you see them in certain settings (like school functions/committees, church, sports) and you can even get really close. Especially if the relationship lasts a long time. BUT.... for some reason it just doesn't bloom into a full blown friendship outside of that setting. You know what I mean, right?

A few months ago, I was taking some food over to some friends we've known in our church for 20 years. Hmmm, that can't be right! I'm not old enough to have friends I've known for 20 years!! Anyways, we haven't seen much of this couple lately and Rick and I enjoyed chatting with them again. We talked about a whole group of us getting together again like we used to, but the husband, Roger, said that his lovely wife, Susan, doesn't want to have anyone over until she has a few things fixed in the house. Boy, can I ever relate!

That got me thinking about my stinkin' dining room carpet, or rather lack of stinkin' carpet! And the pulls in our berber from Astro's claws, and the cracks in the tile, and our less than special back yard, and....,...., and ...., and ..... Now don't get me wrong. We have a lovely home that we've lived in for just over 8 years. I love the size and layout. We're in a beautiful neighborhood, close to our church that we seem to be at all the time, close to our friends, close to what we need, etc. Our house is just at that point where it needs some touch-ups, some fixing up, some repainting, etc. A clean layer of most things. Got the picture?

Then, I think about our finances and how every dime we have goes to our children's tuitions, physicians, therapy, meds, my meds!!, Rick's meds!!, and that we are doing the best we can. Our house can wait, our children can't. Their future is right now!

I also think about people I meet thru outreach work with our church, see on TV or read about that have lost their houses due to job cuts, illnesses, the economy, etc and know how fortunate we are to have all the blessings that God has given us. I should be grateful for having carpet (even with the runs or stains), tiles (with a crack), a yard (without landscaping). Geez, now I feel guilty. God also gave us humility.

BUT... then comes the latest junk mail with all it's real estate, new home construction or remodeling photos and I go right back to thinking how embarrassed I am by the state of my house. Some of those 7 deadly sins raise their ugly heads again.

Wait a minute - what am I so ashamed of? That we spend all we can and more on giving our children the best chance in life with the conditions they were born with, and still find a bit to give back to God. That we have a lived-in home? That I spend more of my time on Rick and my kids and our lives than my house? Hmmm, I bet that's how God wants it! That my kids and dogs and cats are constantly in and out of my house so much I can't keep track of their shoe/paw prints? Or is it that I think people will see me as a terrible person because I don't want to scrub my carpets until they shine, glow, unstain!!! Hey, news flash! I don't want to scrub my carpets. I don't want to wipe every scuff off my walls. I don't want to spend every dollar we earn or every hour of every weekend fixing up my house so it looks like Better Homes and Gardens. Well, I wouldn't even come close, but I could dream.

I, just like all of you, want to live and play and laugh. I want to do fun things, go to movies, take a nap on Sunday afternoons (now that my kids are older and I don't have to worry about them running out the door naked wearing nothing but a Batman cape), be outside when Texas weather permits, dance in my living room while listening to my iPod and do just enough chores and laundry to keep us going. Don't get me wrong, I like a clean kitchen, a sparkling fridge and a tidy underwear drawer but Betty Crocker I ain't!

So, what's the bottom line in all of this verbage? I'm intimidated by my friends' houses that look so neat and tidy when I go in them. They all look so clean, beautifully/charmingly decorated, organized and updated and mine, well...... doesn't. But, I guess I don't want to work as hard as all of my friends to have houses that look like that either. Wish I did, but oh well. Or maybe, like Roger and Susan, you might just feel like I do. That we all want to be more social, wish to be more spontaneous and invite people (other than our closest friends/family) to come over just for fun and hope than they care more about the people in the house than the dust bunnies hiding in the corners.

So, next time I invite you over you BETTER NOT comment on my concrete floor if you know what's good for 'ya! Just kidding. Hey, Roger and Susan, your house or mine?

OMG! I'm LOL/ROFL/ROFLM*O! Wanna Come?

I just posted a story this past weekend for the first time in 8 months. I had to check the rest of the blog site to see what else was needing a fixer upper and decided to add a link to a YouTube video. Turn to the right (shout out to the great move "Raising Arizona"), scroll down to my Do You Like YouTube section and click on Baseball Players Dance!

Isn't it hilarious! I just love it. Yes, I love music, all kinds of music and dancing. I also don't mind watching baseball, seeing as that's Rick's favorite sport and he used to play. Actually, he still plays for the Klein Krawlers team, when he hasn't pulled a muscle or sprained something. Aren't baseball players just mighty cute! Gotta love a man in a uniform. Okay, had a little bit of an ADD moment there.

The real reason I love this video is because it symbolizes how I try to view my life. Here are these people, on the field fired up to do their job. Life (in this case, rain) gets in the way and what's their reaction? Did they scream and yell, pout in the dugout, pitch a fit to their team manager, shake their fists to the heavens?

No, they danced. They let go of what they couldn't change and decided to have some fun. They even had fun with the other team, their opponents, the "enemy". The best thing they did was laugh.

When I was growing up there were lots of wonderful things and some not so great things to deal with. Somehow, as I became a teenager and young adult, I focused more on the 'rain delays' in my life. I was shy (I know, hard to believe, huh?), too serious, and afraid of life. Really afraid. The ironic thing is that, at that moment in my young life, I didn't even know of the rain delays heading my way, let alone the hurricanes!

You wanna know what changed things for me. Marrying Rick and becoming Lauren and Josh's mom! Have you heard my hubbie do impressions or tell a joke? He's a riot. Was the hero of his fraternity for winning them a keg in a comedy contest in Austin. Won a trip to St. Louis to see MLB after coming out the winner in a sports impersonation contest held by FM 950 KPRC. My kids inherited his talent for voice impersonations and witty thinking. When the 3 of them get going, I laugh so hard I cry. They do a mean "Family Guy" routine (even though I hate Family Guy; it's so rude!). But it wasn't necessarily the wonderful family moments or fun-loving goofy things that brought me out of my funk, although it should have. It was the heartbreak. The rain delays. The hurricanes and tornadoes. As life swirled around us as a family, at one point I thought I might just go down the tubes. Fortunately, God made me survivor, determined to get through the bad stuff and come out the other side for the better. Heart surgeries, PDD, bipolar disorder, specialist physicians, schools not being able to help my kids leading to therapeutic schools across town, medication side affects, financial strain to the max, PTSD, driving 120 miles a day, etc....

I thank God for my faith every day. Some days it's stronger than others, but it's always there. Has been growing daily for 2 decades now. God has given me many gifts to get me through - my personal strengths, family and friends who love and support us, wonderful professionals to guide and teach us, HOPE (that's a biggy) and LAUGHTER. Thank God for laughter.

I love to laugh. I laugh a lot. I have a unique laugh, or so I've been told 100's of times. Not sure what "unique" means but, .... it doesn't concern me. Isn't laughter one of the best medicines for a body, mind and soul? It totally and instantly takes me out of what I'm stressed about, makes me feel younger at heart and full of life.

I can't wait to see what cracks me up (with laughter, that is) today? Here's praying that you as well will have that belly jiggling-snorting through your nose-laughing so hard you cry-almost wet your pants-laugh so hard people around you start laughing kind of opportunity today. If you do, leave me a comment and tell me what happened to I can chuckle some more!

LOL/ROFL/ROFLM*O!

I'm Standing Up

So, lately I've been getting this message over and over ............. STAND UP FOR WHAT IS RIGHT! You know, this is not easy. Simple but not easy.

The real problem I have is why is it not easy? Why are some considered to be a rebel, outspoken, being difficult, bossy, opinionated, or judgemental for doing the right thing? Isn't standing up for justice being done or doing the right thing what we're all supposed to do?

Take this situation. If someone is sick, not of body but of mind, and behaves in a really sick way that hurts other people, why is it wrong to stand up against that! Now, by standing up against it, I DO NOT MEAN doing that person wrong in return. No bad-mouthing, no gossiping, no character attack, slander, etc. ............ just holding that person responsible for their behavior. Like holding a mirror up to their faces. Sometimes it's just not enough to turn the other cheek or to walk away. Not everyone should be let off the hook.

Just because sick people don't like someone saying "Your behavior is not appropriate" that doesn't make it wrong to say. Right? I know in this day and age we're supposed to be politically correct and not hurt other people's feelings, but come on people!

So WWJD? Jesus didn't hold back his comments about society's bad behavior. At times He was VERY vocal! He also was loving, generous, understanding, caring, dependable, forgiving and moral. I'm not saying I'm like Jesus but I do try to be like Him. That's what my devotion to my Christian faith expects of me. I'm not being self-righteous or pious. I hold myself to high standards. I expect anyone who sees ME acting in such ways to call me on it. Please do. I want you to.

Let's shake on it!

I Can't Stand It Anymore!

So, my last post was in January. Then,....... nothin'. Those who know me know that when my family has a more than a Rainey kind of day, more like a thunderstorm kind of season, then I hunker down in whatever the hailstorm is and deal with it. But, I promised I wouldn't post it, wouldn't dwell in it here, was going to keep my blog positive.... I have to break my promise!

Why? Because it's not me. I'm a "deal with it" kind of person. Whatever hits the fan, I'm dealing with it. And again, if you know me, then you know that NOT communicating is NOT my way. I don't shy away from anything painful, hurtful, difficult, because I can't live life if I don't. Keeping my blog positive just isn't logical. Life isn't positive. I don't keel over because my life isn't positive so why should my blog? My blog is an aspect of me and my life must/will go on, as will my blog.

So there, if you don't like any stuff I put in it now, don't read. I'm not being rude, negative or in your face. Just real. Real is what I'm all about. I say in my profile that I'm an advocate for my kids, brain disorders/mental illness, LIFE! What kind of advocate says nothing. Only an inefficient one, right?

Okay then! Let's move on!

.....And Now, For Your Stop Light Entertainment.....

Okay, Kellee, this is for you.

The other day some friends and I were talking about my blog. Someone else overheard us, asked me what a blog was and I told him it was kind of like an Internet 'diary', where I write random thoughts, stories, adventures and opinions to whomever wants to see them. We laughed about how a person's blog posting hopefully is not going to be as private as a diary entry, but that got me thinking......What would be something that I could divulge to anyone who happens to land on "A Rainey Kind of Day" that is not necessarily my usual type of posting but not too embarrassing? I came up with this:

Every one who knows me well knows that there are a few things I do EVERY day, other than what every person does daily. They are, in no particular order, drink strong coffee, drive great distances with at least 1 moody person in the back seat, pick lots of yellow dog hair off of my clothes, make sure EVERYONE in our house takes ALL of their medications!!!!!!, sit still for 30 seconds and think "OMG - this is my life", tell Astro to get out of the garbage, pray to God to get through the next hour, thank God for getting me through the last hour, wipe Astro's muddy paws even though the other 2 dogs are perfectly clean, tell Astro it's a darn good thing he's so cute, dance and sing. Today I'm going to focus on the last 2- dancing and singing.

I love to sing. I sing every day, to every song I hear (except rap - me and rap - they don't jive, man). See what I mean. I don't even have the lingo down correctly. Anyways, I don't think I'm capable of just listening to a song. I HAVE to sing it. Even if I don't know it. Once you've sung in choir long enough and are familiar with music you can tell pretty much tell what notes/key changes are coming up next. I love my singing and God loves my singing. My children used to love my singing when they were under the age of 10. Nothing calmed them down more than me singing to them.

The only problem is that my voice is only a so-so kind of voice. I'm fine to sing in a big choir, and once in a while I can surprise myself and realize that I've sung something well, but for the most part, I'm just a marginal singer. Now this is hard for me to admit. Okay, okay, stop your laughing! Admit? What's to admit, you say? You've known this all along, you say? What's hard for me is that I'm used to only doing the things I do well. I'm a bit of a perfectionist, in case you haven't noticed. :) I LOVE singing so much I'm willing to lay my flaws out for everyone to hear just so I can sing. If I really got bold, I would love to take voice lessons, but I might have to take a sip of tequila (oops, not tequila - remember Sept. 1983) coconut rum to sing by myself in front of a voice teacher. Only my husband and children have to listen to me sing because they love me and wouldn't be able to find anything in the pantry, have matching socks, know where the stamps are, or when it's time to go to the dentist without me. If they don't let me sing, I walk! I mean it!!! I pretend I don't see the eye rolling.

So, I've confessed the singing part to you, well most of it, but as you can imagine, along with singing comes dancing. My passion for dancing is just about as strong as it is for singing. You can't have 1 without the other in my book. That's why I love the Joyful Noise choir. I get to sing AND dance with a bunch of little ones who don't complain about my lack of talent and the other leaders don't say anything because they are my friends and wouldn't hurt my feelings. It's the best of both worlds. The other place where I do most of my singing and dancing is in my car. Yup, in the car. I carry a large variety of music with me, everything from Alan Jackson to Enya, Aerosmith to Josh Groban, Phil Collins to Christian music, classical to Buddy Holly to Andrew Lloyd Webber music. Right now, I'm on a movie soundtrack kick. I go back and forth between Mamma Mia, Hairspray and Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat (we have the video production w/ Donny Osmand as Joseph). You tell me how I'm supposed to sing these songs without dancing!!! Yea, uh huh, just try it yourself and see if you're successful. You really can do a fair amount of moving around as you drive and still be safe. Obviously I don't move my feet, but you can move your shoulders, hips and hiney, make hand gestures (not the rude kind - the ones that go along with the ones from the movie, you silly willys) and of course the head and neck. Remember, I am half Egyptian.

So, while you drive down the road and see other drivers talking on their cell phones, eating, putting on makeup, picking their noses (only men do this, because women know that people can still see you), shaving, etc... you can find me belting out "Good Morning Baltimore" or "I Can Hear the Bells" from Hairspray and doing as many of the motions as I can (and still be safe!). When I get to a stop light, baby watch out 'cause there are no holds barred. I'm performing full force and I don't care who's watching. I could totally see myself on some stage somewhere. Maybe not Broadway. Maybe not even Tomball Theatre but hey, in my head, I'm awesome!

So, this is my sad but true diary/blog confession. Now you know the whole truth and nothing but the truth. Sadly, God did not bless me with the talent that I think I'm supposed to have, but the older I get, the less I care what others think. My friends and family love me for who I am, I can laugh at my self and as for the rest of 'em..........well, I'll have to save those words for my real diary!

Beth, the Plagiarizer - I Should be Ashamed, but I'm Not!

I don't have to think of a clever post today. My friend, Hilary, did it for me in her post titled "I Get Knocked Down .....". ! Click here and you'll understand.

Go ahead, I'll wait!

She wrote exactly how I think and feel, and she got a video embedded in probably 1/4 of the time it takes me to do it. This explains why she's one of my best friends.

Hey, I remember that Chumbawumba video......I was probably living in Austin, had even bigger hair than I have now, wearing lots of eyeshadow and mascara (big in the '80's), leggings (it's okay, I was much thinner) and flats. If it was my freshman year, I was probably drinking and then throwing up somewhere. Hey, I threw up in some of the best places Austin had to offer. That's what happens when you don't drink in high school and you don't know about Everclear, or Long Island Iced Teas or mixing the two on the same night. I can't drink margaritas to this very day because of a baaaaaad night in Sept. 1983. That's the first and last time I EVER had tequila. If I even get the slightest of whiffs of tequila I'm instantly transported back to The Castillian dorm, 14th floor (I think). Ugh, I think my stomach just did a flip flop just typing about it.

Okay, ......... how did I get from our woes of 2008 to my tequila adventure of 1983. That's what happens to you when you're under stress and you've had a year like Hilary's and mine. Oh my goodness, I'm in sad shape. Pass the Tums, please.

Bye Bye 2008! Glad to See You Go!

Happy New Year! The Raineys started out 2009 just the way we hope the year goes ...... peaceful, relaxed and happy. Rick and I slept in while the kids were entertaining themselves with their Christmas goodies (I can't say 'toys' anymore). Rick made a great breakfast and coffee and we puttered around with no real agenda. It was great.

Josh's favorite gift was Guitar Hero for his Wii system. He's really good on the guitar and now the drums, although I can only do the guitar so far. Today we broke out the microphone. So, while Josh was the drummer I tried my hand at being the lead singer. Rick was our audience and I guess I must have done a pretty good job because Rick took off his shirt, flung it over his head and then threw it at me. Wow, having a groupie is a mighty awesome thing!

A miracle occurred and we can now see the floor in Lauren's room. She's working very hard and is just about finished. Oh my, it's been 9 months in the making (or should I say 'messing') so I'm impressed that she did it in 1 week. Hey, when Lauren sets her mind to something, it's going to get done and you better just get out of the way.

We've had a great Christmas, filled with down time and busy time; being at home and visiting; being on our own and being surrounded by friends and family. Most of all it was a chance for us to regroup as a family of 4, settle our minds and bodies and remind ourselves of what is REALLY important to us in life. Now our goal is to make 2009 the best we can, regardless of the circumstances. Lord knows we all get thrown curve balls but it's how well we catch them that really matters.

The song that our children's choir will sing in January is called "Trust in the Lord" and it's one of my favorites. My family, in their kind way of laughing at my Kindergarten ways, chuckles at me when I practice my Joyful Noise songs because I'm doing the choreography (shout out to you, Hilary) as I sing and, of course, I have to put a lot of expression into my voice and motions to convey that to the kids. The song is based on my favorite scripture, although I'm far from a scripture quoting person. These words just seem to sum up what's happened to me, to our family, and I choose to have faith and trust in God, knowing that He has a plan. I don't know what those plans are (they look like stinky curve balls to me!) but He knows better and I will know why eventually. I really do trust in the Lord and will continue to in 2009. Will you?

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths" (Proverbs 3:5-6)